"The opposite of depression is not happiness but vitality"


"The opposite of depression is not happiness but vitality". I may seem to be doing good, but... vital? That is still such a foreign concept. How sad it makes me to realise that all this effort, all these years... not once do I remember feeling vital.

I find if so hard to be inerested in anything. All I do is nothing more than what I'm required and have to do, like school, only because I'm afraid of failure. Am I really getting better? I sure hope so, but god knows I do not believe I am. It feels more as if I'm being distracted from my bitter sorrow. "Bitter sorrow about what?", you say? I wish I knew.

Is it just my pessimism making me think this way? How can I tell? Does it even matter though? Is it worth trying to convince me otherwise when my brain is sure its wαy of thinking is absolutely not wrong?

I tend to overthink, and all these unanswered questions entertain my thoughts at night till my eyelids are too heavy to lift anymore. I keep the moon company till it's replaced by the sun again. 

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